plotting to unnerve her

[self_composed]

Bella finds Milliways in the moon palace instead of one of her balconies.

"Huh," she says aloud.

Then, to Alice, Libby, Elena, and Mary, and Lazarus except he autoreplies with a busy message, [Hey folks, Moonstone Palace grew a bar that I don't remember putting in, come check it out.]

Comments

[self_composed]

"Thanks!"

[manofmyword]

Curiously: "What about his parents?"

[self_composed]

"His father's in jail," Bella says. "I helped. His mother lives in a mansion in my hometown, with a housekeeper who I am trying to set up with my dad."

[manofmyword]

"Jail," he snorts. "Yeah, that'll work."

[self_composed]

"Well, he hasn't escaped so far," Bella says, "and if he does, we have magic powers and he does not."

[manofmyword]

"I killed mine," he says offhandedly. "When I was, mm, fifteen?"

[self_composed]

"That doesn't surprise me overmuch," says Bella. "Both of them or just him?"

[manofmyword]

To answer this question as concisely as possible, he makes a blowing-up motion with his hands and adds the appropriate sound effect.

[self_composed]

"Mm. Mine's parents divorced rather acrimoniously as soon as there were public allegations. I've always found Judith sort of vaguely inoffensive. But I can understand not caring much if she was collateral damage."

[manofmyword]

"Yyyep," he says, "that sounds like mom. Never says a word as long as he can keep it under wraps, but once it gets out there—abandon ship!"

[self_composed]

"At the trial she said she was afraid he'd turn on her," Bella says.

[manofmyword]

He shrugs. "Maybe she was."

[self_composed]

"At any rate, Alice mostly doesn't live with her anymore. Hangs around the house sometimes - he's fond of the housekeeper, she's neat - but I made him an underground lair where he hangs out and bakes and sews and sets himself on fire."

[manofmyword]

The Joker flashes a quick, appreciative grin. "Sounds like the life."

[self_composed]

"He likes it," Bella says cheerily.

[manofmyword]

"I'll bet he does." He smirks slightly. "So are you two...?"

[self_composed]

"Oh, he fell in love with me way back in February," says Bella. "Then over the summer we zoomed around Europe a bit and I decided to kiss him on top of Mount Everest and start referring to him as my boyfriend to random people to whom such a reference might be called for."

[manofmyword]

He giggles.

"That's sweet," he says, clasping his hands to his chest. "Do you liiike him?"

[self_composed]

"...Yes?" Bella laughs. "Not in the habit of doing either of the above with anybody else."

[manofmyword]

"We-ell, you could just be after him for his pretty face."

[self_composed]

"He has got a pretty face, but nah, I also like him."

[manofmyword]

"Must be nice," he muses.

[self_composed]

"So," Bella says, "how about you? Also nice? Not so nice?"

[manofmyword]

"The girl I like threw me off a building last month," he says dreamily. "Caught me on the way down, but you can't have everything."

[self_composed]

"Why, were you hoping to splat? If you had Wolverine powers like me and Alice I think you'd be less visibly damaged. He burned off all his scars by setting himself on fire without fully thinking it through, and hasn't put them back so far."